Skincare products were responsible for the break-up of my friend's marriage to an incredibly bully. When she met him she was young and he totally swept her off her feet, lavishing her with gifts and flattery. But it was not long before he showed his true colors and started pushing, shoving, and slapping her around.
As is often the case with women, she thought it must be her fault and the first thing she focused on was her appearance. Perhaps her face was not flawless anymore. Maybe her body was rough to the touch. She began experimenting with skincare products. For a while his behavior calmed down and she thought she had fixed whatever was wrong in herself. But a couple of months later, for no apparent reason at all, his temper would erupt again.
I would get the most heartbreaking calls from her after he roughed her up. Sometimes she would actually leave and come to stay with me, but she always ended up going back. Of course while she was at my place she'd buy cosmetics because she'd fled her home in a terror rush.
That pattern continued over the years. I assumed that my girlfriend was losing her good looks from the stressful conditions she lived under. One time, during one of their fires, the bully had actually managed to cut up a fur coat he had given her. I really could not figure out why she stayed. All I know is, every time they made up she got another expensive gift. After one especially brutal fight she found a Lexus in the driveway with a bow around it.
As her jawline began to sag and small wrinkles started started appearing she bought more and more expensive skincare products. When they did not do the trick she had fillers injected into her face. After the swapping went down she always looked better as a result of one of these treatments, but they were expensive, painful, and had to be repeated.
Of course I was getting older too and, even though I did not have someone abusing me, my face was showing signs of age also. I did not have the time, money or desire to have fillers injected. But cosmetics cost money too, and I also believed that more expensive had to be better. However, the results I got for the money spent were not worth it, in fact they were practically non-existent. It was time to try something else.
I went to a dietitian and began eating right. I cut out all junk food and joined a gym. She taught me about natural skincare products that did not have harmful chemicals in them. She taught me how to read labels and introduced me to companies she had searched and believed in. But she did not want me to take her word for it, she gave me homework to do. I learned an awful lot and am grateful to her to this day.
Of course I passed on my new knowledge to my girlfriend. At first she did not pay much attention because she did not believe any skincare products I bought could rival the injections she was getting in her face. But, as she saw me looking better and better, seeing was believing. She realized I really was building my own collagen, at a fraction of what she was paying to have it shot into her. So of course she bought the same things I was using, very excited to try them.
The new regulation I put her on worked miracles. After six months she realized she did not need to go back for more filler or botox. She was thrilled. She almost felt like she had a new lease on life. She started emptying her cabinet of all the jars and bottles of old cosmetics which she was never going to use again,
But her timing could not have been worse.
Her bully of a husband walked in right at that point and the sight of all the cosmetics clutter set him off big-time. In one motion he swept his arm over the counter and sent everything crashing to the tile floor of the bathroom. Maybe it was a good thing, because it was the straw that broke the camel's back. This time she had the strength to leave.
Luckily her wonderful new skincare products that I had started her on were in a special little drawer so they were not destroyed. When the abusive husband left for work the next day she packed just one suitcase with her most precious possessions and took off forever. And you can be sure she did not forget to take what was in that little drawer.