Of all of the emails that I get asking about clues points to cheating, text messages are by far the most common topic. People want to know if deleted text messages are a sign that indicates probable cheating. They want to know if they can read texts that have been deleted. And, they want to know if there is any logical and legitimate reason that an innocent spouse would want to delete texts that are completely appropriate. I will discuss all of these things in the following article.
Why Text Messages Can Be A Cheater’s Best Friend: Spouses who cheat love technology. They especially love text messages because it is an easy, cheap, and immediate way to connect with or communicate with the person who they are cheating with. (They love picture messages also.) There’s something playful and alluring about sending a text or picture and getting an almost immediate response. Plus, you can immediately delete anything that you don’t want for your spouse to read.
Almost everyone has a cell phone today and most of us carry them with us everywhere we go. So, it’s not all that suspicious for your spouse to be carrying one with them and / or messaging and checking email on it. This is a behavior that they hope and assume will not bring your attention to their cheating.
But what they don’t count on is that usually, even the most laid back spouse will eventually suspect that something is wrong or off. And, once that little voice in the back of the faithful spouse’s head begins to speak and ask questions, then suddenly they are noticing every out of place or recurrent or excessive behaviors – and that includes your cell.
Plus, even if the cheating spouse is very careful to hide their texting, this is the logical first place that most suspicious spouses are going to look. Other than your email and internet trash can and recycle bin, your text message out, in, or sent box is one of the first logical places to check.
Why A Deleted Text Message Doesn’t Mean That You Can’t Catch Their Cheating. You Can Usually Read These: The very crafty and sneaky spouse will usually think that they’ve gotten rid of all evidence of their inappropriate texts by merely hitting delete. This can give them a false sense of security and they’ll keep right on messaging back and forth and leaving a trail even though they assume they are perfectly safe.
But, hitting delete isn’t the end of the story. There is software that will get these texts and photos back and allow for you to read and see them without a password and even if they’ve been erased for a long time. This can be very very useful because usually all the gloves are off in these messages. Since the cheating spouse assumes that this message is deleted forever, they speak freely. This is exactly what you want to read.
I realize that sometimes spouses will swear that their deleting their texts is perfectly innocent. They will tell you that they were just cleaning out their files and leaving room. Or they will tell you that they just wanted to get rid of things from work that are outdated now. Well, any reasonably recent cell phone will automatically delete messages once the files get full. This is true of even the cheapest phone.
So, I rarely believe it when I hear someone claim that a pattern of deleted messages was completely innocent. Why go through that trouble if you have nothing to hide when this happens automatically? But, if you have any doubt of this or suspect something, it’s very easy to check this out. And once you find the texts in question, you can then plug in the phone number to find out who the other person is and who the cell belongs to.