It can be quite a challenge for any girl when they discover that their ex boyfriend has started a new relationship. It can lead to a whole host of negative thoughts, including wondering why he has moved on, and so quickly too.
After any breakup you are feeling down and low, and when your ex boyfriend has found a new girlfriend, and appears to be very much in love with her, it can make the whole thing much worse.
Feelings Can Take Time To Change
One of the things you will want to know is whether he has any feelings left for you at all, which is natural, particularly if you broke up with him recently. Each person moves on after a relationship at different speeds, some getting over it quicker than others. If you are still torn up inside about the break up of the relationship then it can be confusing and upsetting to see him with a new girl on his arm.
Sometimes he could be with someone new because he is trying to deny his feelings for you and to replace you. Everyone has a different strategy for getting over the breakdown of a relationship, and his way of doing so may seem odd to you, but makes sense to himself. For some people, dating after a relationship ends is one way of forgetting the pain of the end of the relationship and trying to get over it.
However, he will still have feelings for you after the break up because they don’t just disappear over night. Human beings create close connections with other people, and these connections are difficult to break. The longer you were together, the stronger the bonds between you will be and the harder they can be to get over.
Wait For The Honeymoon Phase To End
As you probably know, whenever you start a new relationship you go through the honeymoon phase where everything is wonderful and anything bad about your new partner is completely invisible. It’s a magical time, but it never lasts. It can last anything from a few days to a few weeks to a few months.
If your ex boyfriend has gone straight from a relationship with you in to a new relationship then he’s either trying to prove something to himself or he is trying to forget about you. In all likelihood, his heart will not be in the new relationship and it could very quickly fall apart.
In his new relationship he will be comparing you and his new girlfriend, and in most cases this is going to be very favorable for you. If you leave him to it and do not interfere he will soon realise his mistake in not being with you.
During this honeymoon phase if you stay nice and pleasant to him, it will confuse his brain and he is going to want to know why you are being so nice.
Rebound Relationships Are Doomed For Failure
In most cases, a rebound relationship will not last any more than around eight weeks, which is the length of time it takes for your ex boyfriend to realise that he’s with the wrong person and has tried to move on too quickly.
Dating can be a good distraction for him to stop him from having to deal with his real feelings. It is a common thing for men to seek another woman to help them forget about their feelings and to pretend that everything is okay.
You’ll be realising now that when his new relationship is not solid, you have much more chance of getting your ex boyfriend back again. If you are patient and let things run their course, the chances are he will come back, and much sooner than you may have thought, without any work from yourself.
By keeping control of yourself and being pleasant during his rebound relationship he will remember his feelings towards you and it will put a wedge in his current relationship. You’ll find that it can be difficult to be nice during this rebound phase, but if you can do it, then it will start to re-kindle his feelings for you.
Control Your Emotions And Don’t Show Any Jealousy
If you want to win him back then you need to control your emotions and avoid showing any jealousy about his new relationship. The last thing you need to do is to make him think you are a petty, jealous person, that’s not going to attract him back again. It can be difficult to do this, but it is important if you want to work on getting him back.
If you happen to see them together, just make sure you are polite to them both. It’ll be tough for you, but respect yourself and avoid boosting his ego and it will work well for you and will undermine their relationship by putting doubts in his mind. By not showing any jealousy he’ll start to wonder if you have any feelings for him at all. It’s powerful human psychology and he’ll start to be interested in you again.
By taking this almost aloof approach, you will find that he mysteriously becomes attracted to you and wants to know more. Men are attracted to things they can’t have and if he thinks you are not interested in you, then he is going to be interested in you.
Taking It Forwards
There are a lot more things you can do to get your ex boyfriend back and make him realise that his new relationship his a mistake. If you understand the male psyche and how men react to things you can work it in your favor. You’ll be able to win his heart back without having to force or persuade him.
Once you learn to get him attracted to you again, you can take further steps to win him back. Using these techniques you can spark his feelings for you once more and see him start to take an interest in you and your life. At this time you can start to reel him in, back to you again.