C’mon now, you can’t hide behind Digital Dreamgirls forever. There comes a time when you have to replace your virtual-world sweethearts with the real thing. On a more serious note though, chatting up girls, for want of a better phrase, can be a huge challenge for some guys to the point where it becomes a major social problem.
It’s all about FEAR! Now if you think about it, ‘fear’ stands for False Evidence Appearing Real, and so many of our fears can be easily conquered by facing up to them. Easier said than done I know, but approached in a systematic way, this ‘how to talk to girls’ scenario will be a thing of the past, but it does require a little action from you.
A few snubs or bare faced rejections are enough to set anyone back that’s for sure, and especially if you are new to the dating game. For some guys a rejection is but water off a ducks back, whereas the more sensitive soles around, who tend to feel more than they think, can take it all very personally and bank it into the negative subconscious.
There’s heaps of advice out there on the internet on how to talk to girls, some of it better than others, and some of it downright nonsense, but one things for sure, you’ll not meet many members of the fairer sex by sitting at home thinking about it. Reading up too much will not help either as it will only present you with complicated solutions to what is in fact a very simple problem.
All woman are different and there’s no one magical approach or chat up line that will have them falling into your arms. The first thing you need to do when starting a conversation with a woman is to kick up a dialogue that will keep her interested. You actually do very little talking once you’ve got her tongue wagging. Did you know that the best conversationalists in the world are those that speak little and listen a lot? Don’t try to impress here with the big I AM. Show interest in her, what she does, what she likes etc. It’s not rocket science, most folks just love the opportunity to talk about themselves if given half the chance.
You will find that the above approach will have her pursuing you if done calmly. Women are attracted to guys that show interest in them and what they have to say. But there is a balance. Don’t appear over interested even if you are. You have come over as confident and to convey the message that you feel you are worthy of their attention, and that you’re giving them an opportunity just by talking to them.
Keep it simple. Ask questions and listen to the answers. Make statements that require responses. Show interest with confident expressions even if you feel shy and inferior inside. Any feelings of inferiority will soon pass once the chit chat has begun.
So when you’re thinking about how to talk to girls, think about it as a game to enjoy, and not a test to pass. This is important. As you had nothing from this relationship to begin with, there’s absolutely nothing to lose. Go in just for the heck of it, and remember, have her do most of the actual talking. When she asks you questions, don’t look at it as an opportunity to reveal your life history or attempt to win her over with stories about your success, tell her as little as possible and maintain an aura of mystery and switch the tables around again so that she becomes the talker, not the listener.
That’s it folks. Just remember KISS – Keep It Simple Stupid which is the best way forward. Try the above a few times and you’ll soon realise you’re as good with the girls as the next guy. Have fun!