It’s more common than you might think: your boyfriend or girlfriend breaks up with you, remains in contact, and tells you they still love you. Yet no matter what you do or say, the won’t even consider getting back together.
So what exactly is going on? Why does your ex say they still love you, but no longer want a relationship?
The answer to that question is actually rather simple: your ex wants to have their cake and eat it too. No matter what stage of the breakup you might be in right now, your ex boyfriend or girlfriend is looking to keep you ‘around’ while they figure out their next move.
Why Your Ex Keeps Telling You They Love You
During your relationship, you and your partner developed deep-seeded feelings for each other. The emotional bonds that formed are stronger than you think, and they’re still binding your ex to you… even after the relationship has ended.
Right now, your ex is basically unsure. There’s a part of them that wants to go out and date other people, try new things, and see what else is out there. This is the part that doesn’t want to get back together… at least, not right now.
At the same time though, there’s a part of them that can’t completely let go of you. This is the part of your ex’s psyche that makes them say they still love you. They tell you this to keep hope alive – on your end – and to prevent you from going anywhere while they decide what to do.
How To Get Your Ex To Commit Back To a Relationship
If you do nothing right now, you’re sunk. Your ex will continue to play the field while keeping you just within easy reach. Every time they feel you’re losing interest, the phone will ring. They’ll snuggle up to you and tell you they still have feelings. Yet every time you call them on it by trying to get back together, your ex will pull away again.
To break this endless cycle, you can’t play into your ex’s little game. He or she is being selfish right now by trying to form new relationships while keeping yours on life-support. The romance you had together is barely alive, but by sticking around (and listening to your ex say they love you all the time) you’re making sure it doesn’t die. To get your ex back, you need to finally pull the plug.
Now’s the time to break contact with your ex boyfriend or girlfriend. Stand up to them. Tell them you’re no longer going to stick around, and you can’t be friends with someone you still have feelings for. Either they want to be with you (and you get back together) or they DON’T want to be with you… at which point you’ll walk in a different direction and do your own thing.
This type of approach will jar your ex right out of his or her comfortable little world. For the first time ever, they’ll have to face losing you for good. This will force your boyfriend or girlfriend to make a hard choice, and that’s a great thing. If they have any residual feelings for you at all, they’re going to seriously consider giving your relationship a second chance.